After the last blog, one reader said she was a wee bit concerned (No prizes for guessing which nationality : – ) that it had reflected negatively on Americans.
Thankful for this comment, I pondered further and reassured her that at a personal level we have many wonderful American friends who have deeply influenced the direction of our lives, not least our amazing ‘in-laws’!
I was commenting not on people but on some negative aspects of modern American culture. On researching further the Litigious vs. Relational piece, the statistics confirmed that there are indeed three times as many lawyers per capita in the USA as in the UK! (I couldn’t find figures for Ireland)
I suggested to my friend I might do a blog about “the best of American”, and lo and behold, Raine one of our First American relatives arrived in last weekend to join a group of 24(+3) who gathered to “Dream storm” about a possible “Village” (of ‘barns’, as above) and about the Values we would want such a Village to have.
As we chatted with Raine beforehand, three hallmarks of her Native culture stood out to me that I want to highlight!
She spoke about how her Dakota language studies involved her visiting with Dakota “Elders”. She was given clear themes, and concrete targets for these assignments but as she sat down with one woman who had just lost her sister, she found herself simply “listening” to this Elder, for this was an expression of honor that she had been taught growing up.
At the end of their time together she said to the older woman, “Thank you for talking to me.” to which the bereaved Elder replied, “Thank YOU for listening to me.”
Raine left with her school assignment unfinished, but with her spiritual assignment fulfilled.
She spoke of another Elder whom she had visited 5 times, again falling far behind on what the study supervisor required. However on the fifth visit the Elder spontaneously began to talk about the most intimate aspect of his life….how he prayed….how he didn’t ask for anything, but just gave thanks, talking naturally about everything with Wakan Tanka. This was “the language of the heart” divulged to another, whose heart he had grown to trust.
She had the day before we met been given responsibility to teach a language class to Dakota children at a special event at historic Fort Snelling. Overwhelmed by a big number of rambunctious kids she again abandoned her lesson plan, distributed her paper and crayons and then just began circulating talking to the children one by one. With each one she looked for a way to connect with them as ‘my relative’….
“Ha! your grandmother was my mentor… and now I am teaching you!”
Again the ‘agenda’ had to be surrendered – giving primacy to the relationship resulting in a truer and deeper learning and growing together.
I realized if that these three principles were followed by politicians in America (or anywhere else for that matter!) the political landscape would look very different!
Then I recalled an “Insiders” story I had been told about the Paisley/ McGuinness brokered peace in Northern Ireland I referenced a few weeks ago. I remembered that it was indeed these principles, of quietly honoring, meriting trust, and spiritually surrendering…. principles not just of the Dakota culture, but of the ‘Kingdom of heaven’ culture, that had in fact been behind that ‘miracle’ breakthrough.